Tag Archives: rachel true

My Interview with Black Girl Nerds Podcast

Hey! I did an interview w/ the fab crew at www.blackgirlnerds.com They’re black, they’re nerds, they post great stuff! Def check out their site & twitter feed @BlackGirlNerds & @BGNpodcast & of course me @racheltrue – shout out to graveyardsisters.com @graveyardsister who co-interviewed me!

We cover a ton of topics, give a listen, Here’s the podcast! xx Rachel

Diggs Kinda Sorta Has A Point On Racial Identity…

Recently the actor Taye Diggs made a statement that he didn’t want his mixed son to identify as black, causing a bit of an internet backlash and major trolling for Diggs via Black Twitter.

The thing is, I get what he was trying to say… and I don’t  totally want to agree with the dude who presumably (temporarily) broke the heart of America’s sweetheart Idina Menzel, the white mother of Tayes son.

I’ve worked with Diggs,  he’s intelligent and I think if you look at his actual statements in conjunction with the very positive childrens books he has written, you’ll see the words for what they are, a parent wanting a world where kids just get to be whatever they are, and in this case they are mixed or bi-racial.

I’m the gen-x mixed daughter of a white father, who had full custody, and a black mother but I learned long ago it was easier to say I’m black, mostly because that is how I’m perceived when I walk in a room  and also I’d grown tired of having to prove my mixed-ness…

“well, you don’t look mixed…”

“you’re really dark for a mixed person.”

“Why don’t you just say you’re black?”

“I’m not down with the swirl” (it was the 90’s)

You get the point.

At times there was an internal struggle and I would attempt to code switch to fit in.

I felt I had to deny my parentage to fit in or placate my contemporaries, who were already confused by the patois of my voice, my northern twang still evoking claims of ‘talking white’.  My  very high yellow, let’s just say ‘Gina from Martin taupe’ light (same dad, diff black mom’s) half sister once said I didn’t know what it was like to be mixed. I corrected her by saying “I don’t know what it’s like to be light skinned and mixed”. Being mixed means  having a different cultural back ground, not simply looking  ‘mixed.’

So I feel Taye is saying  why should his child or any child, have to deny part of their story because it doesn’t fit the narrative.

The narrative is bullshit.

The narrative says brown people who say they’re mixed are denying their blackness.

The narrative is anyone in the US with more than 1/16th black blood is black -this dates back to slave times and ownership of people as property.

The narrative is mixed people are always lighter than a paper bag,  ‘exotically pretty’ and tragic.

Uh, no, old school bullshit narrative..NO!

For me and many others this couldn’t be farther from the truth… When we say mixed, we’re acknowledging all our ancestors and hopefully expanding the world view of what ‘mixed’ is.

We all agree for the most part that race is a social construct… We’re all humans right? So to have a phrase such as ‘mixed’ or ‘biracial’ cause such divisiveness in 2015 is mind boggling.

In truth, I am Black AND I am Mixed. I can be and am both. I love my blackness, besides being a woman it is the singular defining thing about me, and I did me some me.

To troll Diggs for wanting to explore and make his child feel comfortable with his full genetic background seems immature.

I agree he phrased it in some pretty clunky questionable dialogue, though…. for a writer and all.

Rachel True

 

 

 

Compliments with qualifiers…

“The thing about compliments with qualifiers, is it detracts from the compliment you’re genuinely trying to  give… duh.”

If I say… “You look great!” Or “that top look amazing on you!”  That might make you smile.

No let’s try this again, I say ~ “You look great, for 36!”… Or “that top looks great, if you lost 10lbs you’d look amazing!”…. or “you’re handsome for a white guy”~

You’re probably going to think I’m socially awkward at best, (which I am) even though my intentions are good.

If you can’t not mention numbers, for the record I’m 211 & rarely seen in daylight, so  get it right.  Or weight ~ none of your business…. Or height ~ I’m whatever height the part calls for. Rest assured I’m comfortable in my skin… though I am as always, a work in progress.

A few short years ago, like so many Gen-xers, I was as the saying goes… fat sick & nearly dead after a garden variety illness & major surgery… Since then I committed to living a healthy lifestyle (for me that means no dairy, no meat, tons of veg and water, exercise… not fillers, botox, or short cuts, I’ve never even had a facial)…  It’s been great & I’m delighted some of y’all are kind enough to compliment the results.

If you’ve been feeling sluggish or not your best energetically, try adding more water, fruit & veg into your normal diet, these foods deliver nutrition & help repair your cells the way nature intended!     ; ) True

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Things I’ve said…

“Hold on, I gotta change my clothes for this grandma audition.”

That said, I have dressed like an extra from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat for most of my 211 years, and perhaps it’s time for a change… I’m thinking French lady chic? Which begs the question…  How do I tie a neck scarf and not look like Rizzo from Grease?  Also, will I feel like a grown up if I start dressing like one?  True

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Products My Natural Hair Loves

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 Hello!
There’s tons of great sites dedicated to naturally curly hair,  this is not going to be one but… over the years  I’ve been asked by a few to do a Q&A type thing but never did, probably because I was  having a bad hair day.
A couple of years ago I over dosed my hair on protein, too much heat & hard water. It split like crazy way up the shaft… yet again, le sigh.
Here’s a wee bit of what helped get some length and body back to my fine 3c hair.
Shout out to my stylist Valerie Harrell and to you, natural hair bloggers! THANK YOU, you’ve all helped paved the way for natural hair acceptance!
 Rachel.
P.S. No one is paying me to say nice things (or not, we’ll get to you some day not so Living Proof) about their products.


 
Some things I do & a few leave ins I LOVE.
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  •  If you must color your hair (oh, and I must) find a skilled master colorist! It’s not always the most expensive person, I’m talking about the person who loves hair,  mixes color like an artist & knows how much bleach your kind of hair strand can handle. For example I’m a low volume demi permanent kinda girl.
  • “Treat your hair like a fine silk shirt”- my colorist Valerie Harrell. Meaning curly hair is delicate &  ends can be years old so  like a  fabric it’ll fray without special care. Even the way I handled my hair in general when pushing it forward or backwards, fluffing etc, was too rough she said.
  • I massage or rub my scalp a lot. Massaging helps stimulate  hair follicles exponentially by bringing blood to the scalp  & it doesn’t cost any $.
  • I stopped getting trims about 6-8 months ago. Now when there’s a bad split or knot I dry trim the strand right away otherwise it’ll take down the surrounding hairs.  If you’re even a little ocd this might not be a great idea for you, some people can’t stop cutting and that’s no bueno.
  • If my hair feels lifeless, limp, not dry, but not happy… It needs protein for structure, but this is only every few weeks followed up w/ a moisturizing conditioner under a dryer.

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  • Weirdly brittle  means I  probably need  a  clarifying shampoo to get rid of silicones and definitely a moisture deep treatment after, under dryer. My hair can get moisture parched quite quickly.
  • Valerie my hairdresser says conditioner can’t really get in the strand w/o sitting under heat. I hate sitting under one at home but I do it cause she’s right.
  •   I read product labels because it’ll say ‘moisture’ on the front but will have wheat or milk protein with silicone for the main ingredients.  Those don’t give moisture & end up just another expensive shaving cream.
  • I like cider rinses & a blast of cool water to seal, but leave ins  that are not too heavy on the oil are key with my kind of curl.
  • Silicones ~ Hair takes a beating under L.A. sun & actress styling. The right silicones in quality products help heat protect my ends to retain length and seal in  moisture.
  • When my hair feels super porous, I’ll break out the old school Roux Porosity Control Corrector and Conditioner. I used  it once in a while in the nineties, forgot about till this year. It’s weird and not at all organic but my hair loves it every three to four weeks.
  • The ‘new trend’ of not shampooing isn’t new. in my late teens after my one & only relaxer wore out i realized just wetting my hair & putting more conditioner worked great for about 2 weeks. When I lived In NYC, and my hair liked more protein, I’d mix olive oil in with Aubrey organics GPB conditioner while wet, then more while it was drying. GBP is a great reg conditioner & leave in if your hair likes it.
  • Post on my fav  deep conditioners coming up.
  • If I didn’t stretch out my curls I’d look like Little Orphan Annie, the white one, not the black one, Q’s curls are on point! I don’t use heat without 2-4.5 layers of product on the ends. I usually air dry then skim my hair with a flat iron and more product on med to stretch. I totally need to get  a waver.

MY HAIR LOVES…
featured x-2653Leave ins!

CASTOR OIL
COLD PRESSED hexane free castor oil is best for my sensitive dry scalp, it’s a great emollient for skin too
Castor oil is all the rage for good reason, it’s been around for thousands of years & is a staple in beauty  & hair products.  Buy your own & add to cheaper conditioners for a boost!  A huge bottle is about $9 and not sticky like  glycerin. I use it on my face!
 My fine 3c curls get weighed down easily, Castor is one the only oils/butters I can use on dry or wet hair, so two thumbs up.

 DARSHANA HAIR OIL
A great  silicone free blend of oils, pricey at $50, but lasts forever.  I saturate my  dry hair a few hours or overnight before a wash & have seen a nice change. I don’t use it for styling or as leave in,  too heavy, wet or dry…  but if your hair’s thicker than mine (and it can’t not be) it’ll probably work great as an all round.
Straight coconut oil or anything with too much protein can make my hair brittle and break off.

 MILK SHAKE INCREDIBLE MILK LEAVE IN W/ MARU MARU
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I tried to keep my products 100% natural for a while, but ultimately the hair wants what the hair wants, and my hair loves this stuff
 I use whatever stops my fine hair from breaking. This product  has a mix of silicone & natural oils  including something called  Maru Maru butter.  I’d love to find some raw   maru to play with, but butters alone usually make my locks look greasy & flat.  My bottle seems to go fast, so it’s a tad pricey at $20, but hey, we’re not into Kerastase  territory, so win win, I say. Plus  I color the heck out of my fine hair so a good leave in that works on already dry hair is a find. My hair likes this a zillion times more than It’s a Ten btw. I’m careful not to get silicone products on my face. I break out from make up, like bb creams with dimethicone etc.
“I use silicones in arid climates, but can go for more natural products like glycerin based leave ins in humidity, like New York City.”

AUBREY ORGANICS PRIMROSE TANGLE-GO LEAVE IN
I’ve used Aubrey products off and on since college!
Glycerin based  all natural mist refresher for wet or dry , works great in Los Angeles in winter, but not during the super dry summer. Great all year round on east coast.  Glycerin, thou art fickle. Yes, I know it’s easy enough to make your own spray, but I’ve never nailed the ratio right like Aubrey, under $10.

Moroccanoil hydrating styling creme leave in
us.can_hydratingstylingcream_320x304_2.14This works like a light moisturizing gel that doesn’t turn my hair into weird spaghetti curls
This works great on wet hair to set curls, dry to refresh. I don’t use any other products from this line, but my curls LOVE this stuff. Pricey at around $30, but it’s your hair!

SOME TRUE THINGS

460442750-rachel-true-arrives-at-the-chaz-dean-holiday-gettyimagesSometimes I go to parties and hold things. Hope 2015 is feeling good on ya.

Also

A few  years ago I found myself laid up after a health thing. One day I seriously  didn’t recognize my own reflection. After a lot of mental retraining … ie learning how not to emotional eat or eating for ‘entertainment’… quitting cigs, dairy, eggs… physical training w/ a trainer at first, then on my own.  I’ve managed to get  my body healthier than it’s ever been. If I can do it, anyone can, & it feels great to have let go of some vices.

I’ve see the human body to be an astounding machine with fantastical regeneration powers. And on the pure vanity tip a great side effect of eating clean real food,  is it takes years off your ‘age clock’ the 100% natural way!

I’d love to share some of the things I’ve learned, but don’t worry, it’s not all crunchy granola, I’ve discovered youtube make tutorials and can’t wait to get into those… I’m not even talking contouring… well I am but… Let’s focus on where are you all going with your faces that done?!?! I’m an actress &  felt mortified going to the grocery  straight from set, with fake lashes & clip on hair, till I realized the check out girl was more done up than me. What gives? I’m not into hours long primping. Like I will use my fingers to put on eyeshadow. But thank you youtube vloggers for introducing me to the term ‘hit pan’.